TOW #19 - College essay that worked

This week I read a college essay written by a student who was accepted to UC Berkley. The topic of the essay was to "Describe the world you live in" and this student took a very unique path in responding to it. They started with, "Most children acquire the same eye color or a similar shaped nose from their parents, but I've inherited much more: a passion for learning and and insatiable curiosity which has served me well throughout my academic career." (para. 1). This topic sentence of their introductory paragraph is the reason that their essay made such an impact on their admission because of its uniqueness and connection to the student's intended major (computer science). I feel that most students would answer this prompt in terms of their cultural and ethnic backgrounds, whereas this student, who may not have a very rich or involved cultural background, chose to describe what has ultimately affected their world the most. This is an excellent strategy because the student could have easily faked their way through an essay about how their German-immigrant great-grandparents have 'greatly impacted their life'. Instead they chose to take a creative and honest route, all while revealing why they plan on pursuing the major they have chosen. It not only provides a great platform for the integrity of their essay, but also gives a very personal touch.